How to Preach a Bad Sermon

Heard a bad sermon by a "substitute preacher" today in the church I've been attending. Thought I would record some of my analysis. The text was supposed to be Acts 18:24-Acts 19:10 What I got out of if were the following principles on preaching a bad sermon:

1. Avoid preaching on the assigned text.

2. Rather use the assigned to as a springboard to preach on some unnecessarily devisive non-application oriented topic of which the text is obscure. In this case the baptism of the Holy Spirit. And avoid significant applications of which the text is clear.

3. Take the unBiblical position and use bad hermenutics to support it, contradicting texts like, 1Cor 12:13 "For by one Spirit we were all baptized into one body" Rather impose an elistist division among the congregation by falsely teaching on the matter and reckon oneself above scrutiny by considering one's own words to be inspired by God and thus above scrutiny and any criticism to be of the devil. And demand the church achieve "unity" on the matter by agreeing with you on that which is based upon your mere allegation of personal inspiration.

4. Contradict the assigned text where it says that Apollos, "he vigorously refuted the Jews in public debate, proving from the Scriptures that Jesus was the Christ." Acts 18:28 and where it says of Paul that he "arguing persuasively about the kingdom of God." Acts 19:8 Rather say that you used to reason with people, and you used to be an advocate for God, but now (having been "baptized with the Holy Spirit") you have a witness for God, meaning that you preach about your own personal experience of what a good person you have become. Rather than reason with people from the scriptures, preaching the gospel as the Bible does, preach about yourself.

5. Base your argument upon speculation and quotes from literature rather than from the Bible. Claim that your semon is "inspire by God". (That is, raise a flag and see if someone salutes it) - this kind of stuff doesn't get pass us Bereans. And claim it's validated with anecdotal evidence. Take the utilitarian stand arguing that your opinion is correct because it has proven useful in your opinion. (i.e. people allegedly became Christians because you were baptized with the Holy Spirit)

6. Don't allow your sermon to be scrutinized, contrary to the text which says of Apollos, "When Priscilla and Aquila heard him, they invited him to their home and explained to him the way of God more adequately." Acts 18:26

7.  Develop an elitist division with the church family by dividing the congregation into those Christians who allegedly have and have not been baptized with the Holy Spirit by asking those who have to stand up. Indeed this appears the only application of the Charismatic doctrine of the Baptism of the Holy Spirit - to divide the body into the haves and have nots.

8. After the sermon play music so loud and so long so that no one can talk with each other.

The Berean Christian Bible Study Resources